Things just getting too much!

I have been in pretty much turmoil emotionally with all the potential complications being thrown at us and to top it off work is becoming very busy and the expectations of me whilst in the office is crazy, especially with managing the team. It came to a point where I was becoming ill and one day Dan got in from work to find me on the bed crying my eyes out and I just felt like I was having a little breakdown, I was losing control!

I called in sick and went to the doctors, I asked them to sign me off work for a couple of weeks so I could try and get myself back together as this wasn't good for mine or the babies health. In addition, I wanted Steven (my boss) to have a bit of a wake up call that I wasn't coping. I have this ability to just get on with things in the office and people depend on me to do a good job so keep throwing things at me, it was recruitment, redundancies, difficult employee issues and it was just getting too much.

I sent Steven an email letting him know I have been signed off and that I would call him to discuss. I was quite emotionally on the call and I think that made him realise that I wasn't in the best place. He was quite understanding.

I went up to stay with my mum with Sienna and as always being around family seems to help loads. I was feeling as though the twins were draining my body and I just felt horrendous all the time.

We told Sienna about the babies and now a bump is showing she is starting to understand but when I ask where mummy's babies are she says '1, 2, 3, 10!' Hmmm, no sweetheart, mummy's not having 10 babies....

We have started getting quotes for our garden to get it fixed up. We thought it would be a good time so it would be ready for the Summer (if we get one) and Sienna can get running around in it. We ended up going with Baxter and Son's and they start in a few weeks (it's costing us £5,900, yikes) but they have to get rid of all the horrible weeds, re-lawn the whole lot, put up new fences, a raised bed, trellis, sort out a play areas for Sienna and pretty much make it look like a family garden rather than dump and weed site!